Warning this is going to be a long post......
I've been thinking alot about my life over the last 16 years.
My life has always had challenges and saying that it will get easier is an understatement. Let me begin...
Rick Washko:
I met him in 2006 at work and at first we were coworkers. We started dating in 2007 and were married in 2008. I loved him and what we had was a unique relationship. It wasn't always easy and we went through alot together. Four months after we got married he lost his job and started going to trucking school because his whole life he wanted to drive semis. At first he was gone a lot and I was home a lot alone. Working, taking care of the pets, cooking and other things to keep busy. We made it through many hard times and moved twice as well. Then August 12 2018 he passed away from a triple pulmonary embolism. My world was shattered. I had friends and family who were there for me and I still remember the day he died like it happened yesterday.
John Stone:
We started dating in 2002 and broke up in 2007. We wanted different things and I thought it would be best to break things off. I wanted to get married and have a family and that was something he didn't want at the time. Fast forward to 2018. John was there when I needed a shoulder to cry on and just to be a listening ear. We officially started dating again in 2019 and we were married in 2020. 2020 we also found out we were expecting and ended up losing the baby shortly after we found out. We were married nine months when John passed away from a brain stem hemorrhage. I begged and pleaded with God that day to not take another husband from me. Since then my Faith has been shattered. John was someone I wanted to spend the rest of my life with. But as most of you know that dream was cut short.
Matt Wilcox:
We met on the Facebook dating app in 2022. We connected through wanting someone to talk to because we were lonely. Found out we had more in common than I think we both realized. He has five kids and I knew that they were a big part of his life. I didn't want to come between them and him. I love that he is so happy when he spends time with any of his kids. It makes me fall more in love with him everyday.
I reflected on our relationship and realized that he makes me happy. He juggles alot with his kids schedules as well as giving us time to spend together. He always is encouraging to me with whatever challenge comes and we have an open communication when it comes to things that are bothering one another. I love him dearly.
So this post isn't to brag on anyone or make people feel sorry for me. This post was meant to be an encouragement to anyone who is struggling with losing someone in their life. I have had two amazing husbands who loved me for me no matter how imperfect I am. I'm also lucky to have met this incredible man who makes me feel loved, beautiful and worthy of love from him.
I know I've shared some of my story before but today I've been sitting and thinking about everything I've been through. I'm asked how did I go through it twice and my response is simple...I just did. I didn't have a choice.
It made me so much stronger going through all these trials.
Please be strong with whatever life throws your way and know I'm here if you ever need someone to talk to.
Love you all and thank you for letting me share my experiences with you.
