Not where I thought I'd be in life

Sometimes people are kind and loving.  Sometimes people are cruel.  

I feel like a baby starving for attention.  

I have a boyfriend who isn't attracted to me because of something stupid that happened.  I have what I thought was amends but in a drunken rage he said some pretty hurtful things.  If I didn't love him so much I would say something.  Even if I say his daughter is ignoring me and rolling her eyes at me, I'm the one who is in the wrong.   

I wish things were back to way the use to before the nonsense happened.  

I'm so depressed and asking what I did wrong to deserve all of this unhappiness.  Why can't I be loved and cherished like every woman should be? 

Why am I being punished and living somewhere I'm not wanted?

I sometimes think it would be best if I wasn't around.  

I'm tired of being sad all the time.  

Thanks

Me